Here's the Plate (Step Up Now, Please)

You can't start a plan without knowing how to finish it.

Raise your hand if you start a lot of things with good intentions, but never finish them. ((HAND RAISED)).

OR

Raise your hand if you intend to start a lot of things "tomorrow" with good intentions, but for some reason "tomorrow" turns into days, weeks, months or even years. ((OTHER HAND RAISED)).

In the great adventure we call life, I'm sure one or both of these situations has been true for you at some point pertaining to some thing. However, the focus of my thought sharing today is around healthy lifestyle. Too often I hear people (literally) say out loud (while eating a brownie, donut or french fries)...

"I'll start that diet and workout plan tomorrow."

This plan sounds fine if that's truly their intention, but most of the time it isn't. In saying something like this, it somehow justifies the unhealthy habit you're performing and adds a bit of humor to an otherwise serious conversation about commitment to a lifestyle change.

In today's world we've never been more aware of how unhealthy certain foods are for us, but we still eat them anyway. We know smoking and drinking is bad, but we still do it anyway. Why?

Because it's fun, of course. And because we're creatures of habit. It's really hard to quit what you've always been doing, but as the saying goes, if you always do what you've always done, then you'll always get what you've always gotten.


Life is best taken in steps of 3.

Most of the followers of this blog are young. I consider "young" to be mid-30's and under, in fact, nowadays that's considered VERY young. I'm rambling. I've hidden behind this excuse before. I'm young and I have plenty of time to change, get better, improve my habits, eat healthier, rest more, exercise more, you name it...

However, just because we're young, doesn't mean that high cholesterol, high blood pressure, heart attack or stroke aren't threats. I'm not telling you these things to scare you, I'm telling you these things because you are in charge of you; and if you don't take action with your own life, who will? You husband, parents, sister, friend, brother, cousin, best friend or whoever can't change you for you. Not even God can change your habits. God will never do for you that which you can do for yourself...

A lot of people have a skewed view of the Big Guy, thinking that he will just Voila! Make something happen. Sorry folks, not the case... God gave us that thing called free will, remember?

 So, what are you waiting for...

A sign? A big event? A moment? 

Well, here it is. Your swift kick in the ass to get moving with a wellness plan for your life.

As cheesy as it sounds, I compare any major transitions in life to baseball. You start at home plate (where you are now), you have three bases to cross (check-in points or steps) and you have three strikes before you're "out" (three flub ups or cheats or whatever). 

If you stay in the dug out or on the bench in life you obviously will go nowhere. Again, I know this is super cheesy, but hey, when in Rome...

Don't stop reading now or you'll miss the most important information contained within this entire blog.

When you're starting out on a plan to better yourself - DO NOT - I will repeat - DO NOT make a goal to be like someone else.

For example...

I want to lose weight to look like Jennifer Aniston.

I don't know who would make this goal, but whatever, it's an example... People, I'm here to tell you that none of us will ever be anything like Jennifer Aniston. Wanna know why? Because she's got millions upon millions of dollars to spend on bettering her body and you know what? I'm willing to bet it ain't all natural. Sorry Jen, secret's out.

You're 100 times more beautiful the way you are anyway.

I know, I know, you're going, yeah, yeah, you're full of poo. But, seriously, give yourself a little credit because guess what? There's only one YOU and there will never be a more beautiful YOU. That's why  you should take pride in yourself and take care of your body!!

The best thing you can do is compete with yourself and give yourself a start and end point that starts and ends with YOU.

Am I being clear? I think so.

Here's an example of a good goal: I want to fit into that black dress I wore to Katie's wedding two years ago or I want to get back to the weight I was before having kids.

I think you get the point.

So, as the title states, here's the plate (step up now, please).

Making a lifestyle change is a big decision. I'm not licensed, nor do I have any professional education in the health field, but it is a very strong interest of mine and I'm more than happy to provide insight if you're looking for help. Feel free to email me at lnnblodgett at gmail dot com.

Note: I'm checking out for the next 5 days. Sorry in advance for the lack of comments or lack of writing between now and my return.

A Challenge From the Boss Man

Toward the later portion of last year I received a promotion at my job. The words "assistant" or "associate" may never be in my job title again and I'm OK with that. I am wo-man, feelin' all successful and shiznit.

So far my new gig has been going swimmingly. I couldn't be happier. I've completely redesigned our website, our "brand" and quite frankly, the way we're marketing (some things) altogether. It's been a really fun project. But, now the re-design is done. We're upgrading things here and there as budgeting will allow, but we're onto other challenges like growing our business...Which is where my focus is primarily.

I received a challenge from my boss last week to majorly test my ability to sell. Not just selling anything either. I have to sell my company, our services, our products and basically open the flood gate with everything we have to offer to one of our newer relationships/accounts to see if I can reel them in. At first I was all hot-headed about the situation challenge you say? I laugh in the face of challenge? Muahahahaha... ((Insert BIG HEAD here)) Why the smart-ass mentality? Because I had just met with the guy a couple weeks prior to this obstacle presented and he already (verbally) agreed to send all his business opportunities to our firm. This last phone call in my mind would simply seal the deal; sign contracts, negotiate comp, whatever, I was gonna git 'er done.

But, not so fast there, slick. There's been one minor issue.... "The" guy won't return my emails or my phonecalls. WTF? Nicole's confidence has gone from elephant to ant-sized and boy do I feel like an over-zealous, over-confident, narcissistic FOOL.

So what now, you ask? The waiting game. You want to know what sucks about the waiting game? The same thing that sucked when you were waiting for "that guy" to call you in high school, college or whenever "that guy" came into your life. My stomach is in knots. I'm nervous. My hands are sweating. I'm drinking too much coffee. I'm over dressing for work. Everytime the phone rings I'm freaking Oh. Em. Geezy. Is. It. HIM?!?!?! Thank the Lord for caller ID.

I know that if this deal doesn't go through that I have seriously done everything I can without appearing totally and completely desperate for this man's business... also know that my boss won't hold it against me. BUT, in the back of my mind I keep thinking if I can land this... It just creates more trust and opens the doors for even more opportunities.

The busy season of my business is starting to pick up. And hey, quite frankly, maybe the meeting that I thought went well about a month ago didn't go as well as I thought... Whatever is going on, I'm sure I'll find out soon enough.

More to come on this saga...

The Act of Moderation

As promised, this is the second of the weekly commitment to a health and wellness-based blog entry. Personally, I've been an avid runner for the past 12 years. I've also done a good amount of weight training, yoga and "boot camp"-ish training. As of late, I've been doing a combination of all these things and it's been fabulous to get my body back in shape after having 2 babies back-to-back...

Since I have always made exercise a part of my life, typically 6 days of the week, my diet hasn't always been the greatest. Usually I can just eat what I want and my weight stays the same because of all the exercise I do.

However, 3 months ago a friend and I challenged each other to take the active lifestyle a step further and work on our eating habits. Neither of us were terribly unhealthy eaters to begin with, but our goal was to eat more "whole foods" versus processed foods and pay closer attention to serving sizes on things such as chips, crackers, cookies... Our reasoning? We decided to view our bodies as "fuel tanks" with the thought that if we fill our "tanks" with "good fuel" our bodies will run more efficiently and effectively.

This was a tougher challenge than I could have ever imagined, but it opened my eyes to mind-boggling things. There are a TON of chemicals and preservatives in our food; even the so-called healthy food or things labeled All Natural or Organic.

Take a loaf of bread from the store for instance - even the bread that says Healthy Choice or Brownberry Multi Grain. These labels are deceiving... The breads are PACKED FULL of ingredients that I don't even understand! Bread should only have 5 if not less ingredients: Flour, Yeast, Water, Salt and maybe honey or grains if you're doing whole grain. And if you think that's bad, check out the label on the salad dressings or the Yoplait yogurts (sorry Yoplait). They're terrible.

If your diet and moderation are things you struggle with, you're not alone. I highly recommend you consider taking this "challenge".

The next time you take a trip to the grocery store, I challenge you to THREE important things. If you take these THREE steps for the next THREE months, I guarantee you will not only see the results in your body, you will feel them.

1. Read THE LABELS. Rule of thumb, anything that you don't know, can't read or don't understand, put back and either (a) buy something fresh or (b) make something yourself.
2. Go out of your COMFORT ZONE. I used to always say that I didn't like blueberries. Now I don't remember why I ever said that! They've quickly become one of my favorite fruits. Along with kiwi (nature's jolly rancher). There are so many different fruits and vegetables to explore! Now that spring is here, hit up the local markets or if you're in a situation to start your own garden, even better! Either way, try new things and search the web. There are thousands of people that are on the whole foods/healthy train. Here's one to check out: http://www.100daysofrealfood.com/real-food-resources/
3. Give yourself some FREEDOM. We are American after all and if you say you don't enjoy a half-pound cheese burger and enough french fries to feed a family every once in a while, you're kidding yourself. Here's the catch - instead of having a "cheat day" allow yourself ONE cheat meal per week. This narrows it in a bit and after a few months, you may not even want the cheat meal anymore (trust me, never thought I'd say that, but it's true for me SOME weeks).

I hope some of you will consider taking the "whole food" challenge and hopefully it's an adopted lifestyle for you. It definitely has been for my family and I don't ever think I will go back to not reading the labels. Not only has it been good for me, it's been great for my family!!

Eat. Drink. Be Merry. :)

Side Note: Prior to making any lifestyle changes, have a pep talk with yourself. A wise, wise woman once told me that loving yourself and knowing yourself is the best skin and body care available. I couldn't agree more. If you want more information about health and wellness, I'm not a professional, but I can provide insight, feel free to email me at lnnblodgett at gmail dot com.

I Just Want to Be (Super Duper) Mad for a While...

I got really angry at my husband this weekend. The kind of anger that makes your blood boil, blood pressure rise, tears well up in your eyes and words come out of your mouth that you have no control over and you never imagined yourself ever, ever saying. And what's worse? I have honestly never felt this type of angst toward my husband in our over 7 years together. I made him sleep on the couch because I couldn't even stand the thought of his toe accidently touching mine while we slept.

So, what'd he do to get me here? Let's just say it was a combination of events...

A couple weeks ago I was buzzing around in the kitchen making dinner. Both boys were hanging on my legs. Jacob is going through a major mommy phase right now, so when I come home from work I am "all the rage" to my young boys. It's truly amazing what I've leard to do one-handed... While I was attemping to stir bread dough with my left hand and keep my toddler out of the flour and hold the baby, I started asking my husband what our plans were for the next couple of weeks. I hoped we could possibly get out for a date night just the two of us since it's way overdue... I was also hoping we could be somewhat low-key and not spend too much money since we are getting ready to take a trip to North Dakota at the end of this month to see family. (And in case you haven't noticed, gas prices aren't exactly cheap these days...)

"Actually this weekend my dad got me and my brothers tickets to an Outdoor Convention Show and then next weekend I'm volunteering at the Ellsworth Chicken Feed all day on Saturday."

This was the first blood boiling moment. Both of these events meant he would most likely be drunk (get completely shitfaced) and be completely hungover the next day.

Why would this irritate me? Because he planned out our weekends without consulting me or asking me if any of this was alright with me. IF we were married without kids, fine, do whatever you want, but we have two YOUNG children. There is an "unwritten code" that states you have to ask your spouse before making plans on a weekend without the other spouse - especially if those plans involve drinking. Why you say? Because when you drink, not only are you away from your kids while the drinking takes place, but if you're anything like my husband, it also usually means he's in bed all day the next day (or at least a good portion of the next day) too. Then before we know it it's Monday and I go back to work and I've spent zero time with my husband.

I took a deep breath, smiled and said in a overly sarcastic voice, "Good for you! I'm so glad you planned out the rest of the month of March without consulting me." Not my proudest moment. But, seriously?!?! I never, ever make plans without asking my husband in advance if it's alright with him. I really wish he would extend me the same courtesy.

And so, this weekend rolled around. I was really looking forward to having some quality time with the kids, but I was less than thrilled about the events to come for hubby. He informed me that the event started at noon, so we headed over to my mother-in-law's (I was planning to hang with her for the day). When we got to her house, she said the event didn't start until 4:30 in the afternoon. This was another blood boiling moment. My husband lied to me about what time the event started and I called him out on it. When I said, "I thought you said the event started at noon?" He replied...

"I said I didn't know what time the event started."

I wasn't about to get into it with my mother-in-law standing right there, so I let it go. He literally looked me in the eyes earlier that morning and said it started at noon. But whatevs. Strike 2. First you plan without me and now you lie. Real cool. NOT.

I quickly shook this off after I had the best day ever with my kids. We didn't abide by any schedules, rules or anything and it was amazing. They were blissfully happy and so was I. I was sad in the back of my mind that Luke missed out on their first photo with the Easter Bunny and all the fun we had outside, but tried not to think about it too much - he made his choice. And I had a really great time with the M.I.L. too - she's an amazing lady...


Colt (2) & Jake (11 Months) with Easter Bunny 2012


Because we were on a "no rules or regulations" schedule on Saturday, the kids slept until 7PM for naps. I called Luke to check in at that point and I could tell that he had already had quite a bit to drink. I told him that we were going to eat dinner then I was going to pick him up to come home. He agreed.

After dinner, my M.I.L. suggested that I go get Luke by myself, then come back to get the kids. What a wise, wise woman. I'm so glad I took her advice.

As I made my way down to pick up Luke, I started preparing myself for the worst. I knew he'd been drinking all day and having fun with his family and buddies, but kept reminding myself that he doesn't get to do this too often anymore. I was fine, truthfully, and was actually happy he got to go out and have some fun.

I went inside to pick him up and we made our way out to the car. Surprisingly, he didn't seem too bad, but definitely had had more than just a couple of beers... We started talking on the way home. Laughing out the events from both of our days, then he made a remark about all the guys taking turns buying rounds of drinks and so I asked, "How much money did you spend?" He replied...

"I spent a lot of money today. Probably $150 trying to win stuff in addition to drinks and food."

This was it. This was the moment. I exploded. You planned two weekends out of this month without me, I blew it off. You lied to me about the time and place of your event to get more time away. I blew it off. But, now you're telling me you blew (possibly) over $200 of our money on CRAP, JUNK, NOTHING?! I never use this word, but seriously WTF?????? Not OK.

All day yesterday I was still stewing, again, this is not like me at all. I apologized to Luke for flipping out the way I did. I think I just need to let myself be mad for a little while until I can sort all this out. Luke said it was OK that I got mad; he knew he had it coming, but he didn't apologize to me at all. Should he have? I don't know.

I'm still sitting on all these feelings today. It wasn't just the money thing, it was everything. The planning without me, lying to me and then on top of it all, spending so selfishly and carelessly. All these characteristics aren't like my husband at all - not the man I've known for the past 7 years of my life anyway.

I need some time. I need to pray. I need to act. I'm sure we will work it out, but man, right now I just need to be mad for a little while...

A Little Irish History - The Claddagh Ring

claddagh ring - "irish wedding ring"

In honor of my Irish heritage and St. Patrick's Day tomorrow, I thought I'd give a little history lesson about the Claddagh Ring, better know as the "Irish Wedding Ring".

No doubt that you've seen this ring before. You probably even have one of your own, but did you know that the heritage of this ring and the meaning of its symbols date all the way back to the Roman period? The ring was first introduced in Claddagh, Ireland, during the 17th century and the rein of William and Mary. Claddagh has produced these rings consistently since 1700, but the name Claddagh Ring didn't start being used until 1840 or so.

Traditionally the Claddagh Ring was a family heirloom that was passed from a mother onto her first married daughter. They were large and made of solid gold. The design of the ring spread beyond Claddagh during the era of Queen Victoria and became widespread during the 20th century.

The story (legend) of the Claddagh Ring... has so much folklore and myth attached to it that it is difficult to know where legend ends and truth begins. (Ida Delamer)

The design and positioning of the Claddagh ring bears significant meaning to the beholder. The elements of the ring are said to represent the qualities of love (the heart), friendship (the hands) and loyalty (the crown). They are a symbol of great pride for those of Irish heritage and also a symbol of friendship and love among others of non-Irish or Irish heritage.

Claddagh rings are used in romantic or friendly relationship depending on the intentions of the wearer and/or the giver. How the ring is worn by the wearer conveys relationship status in the following ways:

1. On the right hand with the heart facing outward, the wearer is single and may be looking for love.
2. On the right hand but turned inwards, the wearer is in a relationship, or their heart has been "captured".
3. On the left hand with the heart facing outward, the wearer is engaged.
4. On the left hand but turned inwards, the wearer is married.

There are other local variations about the way the ring is worn and what it means, but these four are the most traditional.

So there you have it, a little Irish history - light and fluffy for a Friday. I wish everyone a safe and happy St. Patrick's Day!

I'm Bananas About Bananas (And Why You Should Be Too)

i am a super food.

I know, I know, what a boring post about bananas - Isn't your life interesting at all? But, seriously, I did come here today to preach about my love for bananas and why you should consider getting on the banana train.

Here's an interesting fact about me - I never really ate bananas growing up at all. My mom rarely had them around the house. We ate fruit like apples, oranges, grapefruit, grapes and cantelope most often. Bananas would just rot on the counter and eventually get thrown away or tossed into the freezer for "banana bread", which usually never happened anyway...

I started eating bananas when I was in high school. I started working out more and my boyfriend at the time was obsessed with the fruit - ate a LOT of bananas - because he used to "cramp up" after sports practice. And so, like most other teenage girls, I just did whatever my boyfriend-of-the-moment did too and I have to say that the habit of eating a daily banana has stuck with me and that's the one thing that particular boyfriend gave to me that was actually a GREAT thing to stick with.

Not into bananas? Fine, I get it, they're everywhere and the flavor does get old after a while - However, here's some reasons why you should continue...

1. Bananas contain 15% of the recommended daily allowance of Vitamin C, which helps your body heal, absorb iron and synthesize connective tissue and blood formation. SO IMPORTANT FOR WOMEN IT IS RIDICULOUS. Are you running to eat a banana yet??

2. Bananas supply 20% of the recommended daily allowance for B6, which supports your immune system, plays a significant role in the synthesis of antibodies, helps with protein metabolism, red blood cell formation and central nervous function.

Trying to lose weight? Even Better...

Bananas are packed with fiber that will keep you fully longer. I usually have one with a tablespoon of peanut butter for an afternoon snack that packs an extra punch of protein to hold me off until dinner.

Not to mention that bananas are EXTREMELY CHEAP!

So, get out there and enjoy some of nature's candy bar!

((FYI - I may be doing one "nutrition" or "health" based blog per week. I know it's a bit overdone on the internet nowadays, but it is something I'm passionate about. I'm also confident that with a few simple changes and self control, anyone can learn to love their body and self-image.))

Long Term Care & Why You Should Care

There are 3 questions that I want you to ask yourself before you decide to continue reading. If you answer "NO" or "I Don't Know" to any of the questions, please continue. If you answer "YES". Click "X" at the top of the screen and move on...

1. Do you actually know what long term care is?
2. Do you know how much long term care costs?
3. Do you and your family have a plan in place for long term care (especially for your parents and/or grandparents)?

Lucky for you, you're going to learn something today and even though it isn't a pleasant topic, avoiding it could be financially catastrophic for you or your family. So, here we go...

Answer to #1:
Long term care is defined as a range of services and supports you or a loved one may need to meet health or personal needs over a long period of time. Most long-term care is not medical care, but rather assistance with the basic personal tasks of everyday life, sometimes called “Activities of Daily Living,” such as:

• Bathing
• Dressing
• Using the toilet
• Transferring (to or from bed or chair)
• Caring for incontinence
• Eating

Answer to #2:

The national average cost for nursing homes is approximately $105.00 per day. Assisted living ranges anywhere from $50-$90 per day depending on where you live. You can easily spend $50,000 to $80,000 per year staying in a nursing home. These costs can quickly wipe out a lifetime savings, not to mention the emotional effect long term care has on a family.

A study conducted at Harvard University showed that 69% of single people and 34% of married couples would exhaust their assets after 13 weeks (3 months) in a nursing home...

Answer to #3:

Contrary to popular belief, the government isn't going to pay for long term care at home, in a nursing home or in an assisted living center. Did you hear that people???? The. Government. IS NOT. GOING. TO. PAY.

Medicare pays 100% of long term care for 20 days and all but $137.50 per day (as of 2010) for the next 80 days and after that NOTHING. (Medicare will pay for skilled care, but most long term care is not deemed as "skilled care").

People, I don't tell you these facts to scare you or bore you, I try to share this information with you to keep you informed. The National Clearing House for Long Term Care tells us that over 70% of the people ages 65 and older will need some form of long term care during their lifetime, 40% of those will need care in a nursing home facility.

My question to you today is, what's your plan in this scenario?

Listen, I'm 26-years-old and I've already got my ducks in a row as far as DISABILITY planning. But, my parents have ZERO long term care insurance or protection. What does that mean for my family? What happens if mom or dad becomes too sick to take care of themselves?

Many people are under the impression that if something were to happen to one or both of their parents, that they could take care of them. However, I challenge you with these questions. Could you afford to...

• Leave your home.
• Leave your job.
• Uproot your family.

All in order to care for your parents? Not to play devil's advocate with you in this situation, but I bet you can't do any of those three things in reality...

The government was set to provide a long term care program (CLASS) as it was a part of health care reform, but in a previous post I wrote about how CLASS didn't make it through because it was doomed to fail financially.

Insurance carriers are dropping like flies left and right in this marketplace and there may not be any left to provide long term care insurance coverage. Why do you say? Because people are collecting claims like crazy and insurance companies are losing TONS OF MONEY. Unum lost over $400M in 2011 alone because of their LTCI block of business.

With people living longer and diseases that used to be fatal now having treatments that keep sick people alive for longer, we have A LOT of people that are going to need long term care in the future. This thought scares me and it should scare you too because nobody is addressing this issue and what the plan is... Our country will be forced to go back to "grass roots" morals and values and care for our elderly because I can guarantee families will not be able to afford the rising costs of long term care, especially if there aren't any insurances left to cover the costs.

Times they are a changin'...

I hope you learned something from this post. If nothing else, I hope I got you thinking about what your family is planning.

On a lighter note, tomorrow is Friday! Yahoo!

More to come on this topic from me because I'm passionate about it... Thanks to those who made it through!

Gimme a Nice Firm One...

I knew that title would get your attention... And you're all a buncha perverts for thinkin' what you're thinkin'... But, I came here today to talk about hand shakes and hugs because it's come to my attention lately that some people seriously suck at hand shakes and hugs.

In case you're just stumbling across my blog for the first time today, I work in the business world. There is a lot of hand shaking that takes place in the business world from the initial meeting with someone, possibly in the middle of the meeting to seal agreement and then of course at the end of the meeting to conclude the events that transpired.

I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I did receive a lesson on hand shaking when I was in college. Your hand shake can say a lot about you as a person. I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about - we've all had the experience of the person that shakes our hand and we swear we're not sure if there are any fingers on our hand that were left unbroken... But, then there's the hand shake that I can't stand - The "finger tip" only hand shake or the hand shake that doesn't seem sincere - it's sort of weak and not really strong or sincere.

I was taught there are three things you should always do when you give a hand shake - male or female - I suggest practicing with a spouse or partner if you've got an interview coming up because as of late we've had some poor ones...

1. Straighten Up and Speak Up: Pull those shoulders back and life your eyes to look the world head on. CONFIDENCE IS KEY.
2. Extend Your Arm and Hand With Confidence and Meaning: Don't make people question what you're doing (is she trying to shake my hand right now, is she initiating something?). This goes back to Number 1 - be confident - put your hand out and...
3. Grab Hold of The Person's Hand Like You Mean It: ((Don't be creepy or anything, there is a time limit on this hand shake)) - But, look the person in the eye, speak up and introduce yourself (first and last name) and for pete's sake, BE CONFIDENT!

Seriously, I'm so sick of these petty hand shakes that I've been receiving as of late - If I can't even hear you introduce yourself and if you don't say something with conviction - sorry, but you just lost some credentials with me... I understand some people are nervous coming into the situtation, but this is the business world - better get used to it.

And the same goes with hugs - I really hate hugs that don't seem genuine or from the heart. Sometimes it's tough to give an all-out hug to someone, but if you're putting the effort into giving a hug to begin with, make it count!

I know this is a petty post, but seriously - one of my pet peeves! If you're going to hand shake in the business world, do so with some confidence and with conviction. Same goes for hugs!

Make it count people! There's only one you in this world, you've already got that going for you so don't be afraid to flaunt what you got!

((End Rant))

Important & Smart Financial Advice Post

I learned something AMAZING last week about how to be more financially responsible. I know, I know, I have two kids and I'm not financially reponsible? No. Of course we are. BUT - This advice is changing the way I perceive "savings" and I hope that it will be helpful for those of you that follow my blog ((thank you for following me! I feel special! MUAH!))



Unless money started growing on trees recently, you may want to pay attention to what I'm saying, yo!

Here's step number 1 in this new financial process that I sincerely challenge you to try - Why should you want to try this process? To help you achieve some dreams... Want to be debt free? Want to save money to buy a house? Want to go on vacation? IT. IS. POSSIBLE.

Read on please and try these steps:

1. Create an account on the website called Mint.com. This is FREE online budgeting tool and best part about it, it gives you a 90 day summary immediately about how much you're spending and shows you by category where your money is going. It can help you reach your goals and budget more accordingly in certain areas of life (rent, food, student loans, etc.). YES; it does take some time so commit at least a half hour to setting it up, especially if you want to get ALL your accounts squared away and for pete's sake, since you're already committing to the process BE HONEST. If you have a credit card, indicate that. Face it. It will get paid off. (Stepping off soap box).
2. You may be slightly depressed after completing step number 1, especially if you're me and you realize you spent $800 on food alone last month and over $100 on alcohol alone... But, the point of all this isn't to depress you - it's to get you to open your eyes and RE-PRIORITIZE. Do it. Use your paycheck to build yourself and your life in a more positive direction - this tool is just the starting place. Step number 2 is to look at your spending, see where you're overindulging and set a reasonable budget for yourself in each category of your life. Figure out the "must pays" and the "optional pays" - "Must pays" are bills that you HAVE TO pay each month. "Optional pays" are just that... They're optional.
3. Look at your "must pays" and minus the total of all the "must pays" from you total monthly income. Now here's step number 3 - Is there any money left over after you complete your "must pays"?? For over 50% of the population, there isn't, so don't feel bad if there's not much there or even nothing left, but if there is money left over don't just leave that money sitting in your checking account to get spent!!!!!!! Which leads me to the next step...
4. Put any money that you are not spending on "must-pays" into a savings account. Put that money to work for you! Even though the interset rate isn't real high right now, it's better sitting in a savings account than in your checking account not working for you or worse, getting spent... AND ALSO, putting the money in a savings account makes it harder for you to access and spend on "impulse shopping" or other non-necessities in your life. It also makes it more PAINFUL to go dig into that savings account, because if you know anything about savings accounts, they're harder to access than a checking account and you'll know the reason you're "digging into" the account is because you went over on your budget and you'll feel like a piece of poo-poo; OR, you'll be grateful the savings is there if something happens... Either way, it's a win/win and a good lesson.
5. The final step is to do this process for as long as it takes to reach your financial goal - whatever it may be - for us, it's saving money to build a house... What's your goal?

You guys, I'm telling you right now that I'm the first person to say financial planners are full of foo-ey and I did this process for us recently. I honestly thought my husband and I were living paycheck to paycheck - but, you know what I discovered? $500 extra dollars every month that aren't getting used on "must pays". You guys, we have two kids, my husband isn't working right now and you know what else? We both have student loans and credit card debt and guess what? I'm not going to tell you how much I'm making at my job, but I will tell you that mama ain't makin' six-figures at her job... Bottom line... There is hope and ways to save money if you just try and budget and spend accordingly.

I had to share this advice with you! Please try it and I hope that it works for you and your families!

Definitely want to hear feedback from those that do it...

A Blast From the Past

I had lunch with an old friend last week.

Let me tell you, I was a bit nervous for this lunch. You see, I'm about 20 steps ahead of most others my age, especially from the area where I grew up and I know it sounds dumb, but I was just worried about what he was going to think of me... Not to mention, I'm pretty sure the last time I saw the guy was in a bar somewhere during the haze that was my college (partying) days.

So we get to the lunch and at first it was awkward as awkward can be. We hugged - talked about how long it had been since we'd actually had a conversation with each other, which we agreed must have been high school graduation (about 8 years ago now)... He was in utter shock that I was married and had two children. His response was that I had two kids and was still "tiny". I can't tell you how much I hate people that remark about this OR believe this stereotype about women - like automatically when you have children your looks have to go away? F that noise.

Anyway, the conversation about our lives went on and on and the more we talked, the more I realized that I missed hanging out with this guy. How did we grow apart? We used to be so close and it was sad to think that 8 years had come and gone and I didn't know anything about him anymore. What's even more sad is that he works within minutes of my office and we'd never known this...

I learned a few things after finishing:

1. I need to seriously see friends more. I feel like I do my best, but wow, no excuses anymore. I feel like I take people for granted sometimes and I need to remember that sometimes when you cut yourself off from people or don't give a little more effort, it hurts them.

2. I'm way ahead of most people my age with having kids and yes, some people think I'm crazy - this guy I went to lunch with was no exception - He asked why we have two kids and I told him that we didn't plan it, it just happened to us and sometimes life just happens and you roll with it. I wouldn't trade having my children for the world. Sometimes I feel like my friends are looking for me to say I would take back having kids or they try to fish and poke around for me to say something along those lines and sorry folks, I would never, ever say that. Having children is a blessing. I'm blessed to be a mother. One day, when you have your own children, you'll understand, but until then....

3. Sometimes in life you just have to A.S.K. to G.E.T. I never would have gotten this opportunity if I hadn't asked for it. And look all the good that came out of it? Reconnecting with an old friend and finding out things about each other in a personal and professional light...

I'm in the mood to vent so I may post yet again after this one - but I definitely had to share my experience with this lunch because it was just... Crazy, weird, good and fun.