This week has been a bit dramatic, but also life-changing for my best friend. She may not view it that way, but I've known her for years and I can honestly say that she has come leaps and bounds in the area of self-esteem and self-worth, and this week was just another step in the right direction.
If my best friend is reading my blog, she may kill me that I'm exposing her life so, for the sake of anonymity, I'm going to call her Sharon; which is quite fitting because she resembles Sharon from the soap opera that I watch (Young and the Restless on week-daily at 11:00 AM on Channel 4, tune in, it's SO awesome. But, be warned, it's horribly addicting).
Sharon called me on Monday after Christmas and told me that she got into it with her family over the holiday. She proceeded to tell me that she literally had a mental/psychotic/crazy/bitch-fest breakdown at them and I could tell she was feeling some remorse about it.
Normally this wouldn't be the biggest deal in the world, but Sharon's family (her mom and her sister) are living with Sharon, in her boyfriend's home with her and her boyfriend, for little to no cost. Her mom has been there for almost a year, maybe longer, I don't remember exactly, and her sister just stays with them when she's home for visits from college.
Please note: I love Sharon's mom and sister dearly. I've known her for years and she has always been there for me in transitions in my life, in many ways, they're like a mother and sister to me too. And the thoughts I'm expressing are merely out of the frustration and hurt I feel in my heart because of the frustration and hurt my best friend is feeling.
Sharon has done everything she can for her mom, and some for her sister too, but mainly the most for her mom as of late. She has given her a place to live. Her boyfriend agreed to let her stay with them, for little to no cost to her, and Sharon even took on a second job in the past year to help her mom pay some of her bills. Some would say that Sharon has basically been a mother to her own mother. It would be one thing if she was disabled or needed help or care, but that isn't the case here.
At any rate, over the holidays, Sharon had had enough. She freaked. And in my opinion, it's been WAY OVERDUE. As a result, her mom and sister are moving out of her home. Not to say they won't be back for a visit, but they aren't going to live there anymore.
The main reason I wanted to blog about this whole thing was not to expose anything negative or bad about Sharon or her family, but it was to mainly talk about how proud I am of my best friend.
I've known Sharon for 13 years and we have been best friends for most of those years (minus a few years in high school that we weren't close for a while). We've been through hell and back together, we've learned some tough life lessons, we've laughed, we've cried, we've made a million mistakes and fallen flat on our faces, but through it all, we've been there for each other.
This breakdown that she had was seriously a huge milestone for her. Sometimes, not always, Sharon won't express her feelings. She's really good at holding things in and she can keep it in as long as she has time by herself to sort of cope and self-talk and calm herself down. The fact that her family was pushing her that day and wouldn't leave her alone caused her to freak out and have the breakdown.
Some might say this sounds crazy or psychotic, but I think it's a step in the right direction of self-love and appreciation. She expressed how she felt! She told them her thoughts and feelings and the ugly truth! Even though it hurt them and she probably could have composed herself better throughout the whole thing, at least she said SOMETHING. She freed her mind.
When she called me I could hear the regret in her tone as she told me the story, but I tried to assure her that what she did and how she reacted was number one, human, she was pushed to the edge of reason, and number two, that I was proud of her for expressing her feelings. She's seemed better and stronger this week because of it. She got a burden off her shoulders and thoughts off her mind.
Is there anything better than letting something out that you've been keeping in for SO LONG??? No. There isn't. It brings emotional, physical, mental and spiritual relief.
We've all been there, we've all freaked out or lost our cool - feel free to share your own story if you wish...
Friday, December 30, 2011
Sunday, December 25, 2011
This Christmas
I am blogging from my amazing new iPad and had to share that this christmas was the best one I can remember. Words cannot possibly express how much love I have for my family.
I wish all a happy and healthy remainder of this magical day and I promise my next post won't be this sappy or short!
Merry christmas to all and to all a good night!!
I wish all a happy and healthy remainder of this magical day and I promise my next post won't be this sappy or short!
Merry christmas to all and to all a good night!!
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Boys & Girls
So, I need some feedback regarding the ever-debated question, "Can boys and girls truly ever just be 'friends'??"
This week has been an interesting one for me and this topic has come up on two occasions this week. The first with my B.I.L. and his close girl-FRIEND. They truly are just best friends and that's it. But, their relationship is quite interesting to an outsider because they literally look like boyfriend/girlfriend. In a way, it's SUPER cool. They are cuddle buddies, rely on each other for anything and everything, she can talk about anything she wants and she absolutely loves/adores/is his biggest fan, but again, they are just friends. She actually dates and is totally in love (real "LOVE") with his best friend (and no, for those of you who are wondering or making assumptions, my B.I.L. is NOT homosexual, not that there would be anything wrong with it if he were anyway, but he isn't).
Is this weird?
I don't know. It works for them and I happen to think it's pretty damn cool. Especially since she's one of the sweetest, coolest, nicest girls ever - no drama - and if she would happen to become my "sister" someday, I'd be cool with that. However, the chances of that happening are really slim and either way, I'm sure she'll always be a part of our lives because of their friendship.
But, I have to wonder - Is this normal?
Over the years I've tried to be friends with guys. And honestly, it was normally always a jealous boyfriend that got in the way of those friendships. That's where the B.I.L. and his girl-FRIEND are so lucky, her boyfriend is totally cool with this close friendship. Being a girl, let's be honest here ladies, we get dramatic. What I always loved about a boy-FRIEND is that they could normally cool my jets and give it to me straight and challenge me to think more like a guy. This seriously helped me in a lot of hard times when I went through life transitions in high school and college. Another great aspect of having a boy-FRIEND, again, from a female perspective, is they're always looking out for your best interests and typically won't stab you in the back. Girl-FRIENDS on the other hand can sometimes be your worst influence and are more likely to stab you in the back at some point....
The other aspect of my life this week where this question has come up is with me personally and a guy I work with. He started at my office last October (2010) and we've gotten really close because we go on several meetings together and he's on my "team" in our office. He is 30, married to a sweet, beautiful lady and they have 2 kids, boy and girl. So right off the bat we have a ton in common. I'm married and have two kids also. We also both love to run, golf, go to movies, enjoy adult beverages and share our stories from college, marriage, etc. We normally don't talk about anything real serious, it's usually pretty light, casual and fun conversation. He never lets a holiday go by without a gift or a lunch outing/happy hour - He basically is just an awesome guy and has become a great friend or seriously my first, "buddy". I think guy-FRIENDS are buddies.
I have to wonder though, if the shoe were on the other foot - would I be OK if Luke had a friend like this? Truthfully, I don't know how would react to it, but I can say that I trust Luke more than anybody. A female friend probably wouldn't be such a bad thing for him because maybe she'd convince him to buy more flowers and gifts or bottles of wine for me! I can honestly say that my buddy has helped me to cool my jets with the usual female drama and getting mad at Luke over stupid stuff- or as my dad would say, the "ant shit vs. elephant shit" things in life. I hear him talk about things his wife does or says and it helps me to look at myself and moderate my own behavior towards my husband.
In my 26 years, here is where I know and believe I draw the line on what's OK and what's not with boys and girls being just "friends" - if these things are done, I think that it's more than friends and the intentions of this friendship, with one party or the other, may be different than just having an innocent friendship:
In my opinion, boys and girls can play nice together and we can be friends, but I think we do need to be careful. People talk, people assume and people are sensitive. Even someone like Luke that appears all tough, I'm still always conscious of his feelings and am careful. I think that's important.
Anyway, enough about boys and girls for now... Life continues to show me things and I so enjoy blogging about them!!
This week has been an interesting one for me and this topic has come up on two occasions this week. The first with my B.I.L. and his close girl-FRIEND. They truly are just best friends and that's it. But, their relationship is quite interesting to an outsider because they literally look like boyfriend/girlfriend. In a way, it's SUPER cool. They are cuddle buddies, rely on each other for anything and everything, she can talk about anything she wants and she absolutely loves/adores/is his biggest fan, but again, they are just friends. She actually dates and is totally in love (real "LOVE") with his best friend (and no, for those of you who are wondering or making assumptions, my B.I.L. is NOT homosexual, not that there would be anything wrong with it if he were anyway, but he isn't).
Is this weird?
I don't know. It works for them and I happen to think it's pretty damn cool. Especially since she's one of the sweetest, coolest, nicest girls ever - no drama - and if she would happen to become my "sister" someday, I'd be cool with that. However, the chances of that happening are really slim and either way, I'm sure she'll always be a part of our lives because of their friendship.
But, I have to wonder - Is this normal?
Over the years I've tried to be friends with guys. And honestly, it was normally always a jealous boyfriend that got in the way of those friendships. That's where the B.I.L. and his girl-FRIEND are so lucky, her boyfriend is totally cool with this close friendship. Being a girl, let's be honest here ladies, we get dramatic. What I always loved about a boy-FRIEND is that they could normally cool my jets and give it to me straight and challenge me to think more like a guy. This seriously helped me in a lot of hard times when I went through life transitions in high school and college. Another great aspect of having a boy-FRIEND, again, from a female perspective, is they're always looking out for your best interests and typically won't stab you in the back. Girl-FRIENDS on the other hand can sometimes be your worst influence and are more likely to stab you in the back at some point....
The other aspect of my life this week where this question has come up is with me personally and a guy I work with. He started at my office last October (2010) and we've gotten really close because we go on several meetings together and he's on my "team" in our office. He is 30, married to a sweet, beautiful lady and they have 2 kids, boy and girl. So right off the bat we have a ton in common. I'm married and have two kids also. We also both love to run, golf, go to movies, enjoy adult beverages and share our stories from college, marriage, etc. We normally don't talk about anything real serious, it's usually pretty light, casual and fun conversation. He never lets a holiday go by without a gift or a lunch outing/happy hour - He basically is just an awesome guy and has become a great friend or seriously my first, "buddy". I think guy-FRIENDS are buddies.
I have to wonder though, if the shoe were on the other foot - would I be OK if Luke had a friend like this? Truthfully, I don't know how would react to it, but I can say that I trust Luke more than anybody. A female friend probably wouldn't be such a bad thing for him because maybe she'd convince him to buy more flowers and gifts or bottles of wine for me! I can honestly say that my buddy has helped me to cool my jets with the usual female drama and getting mad at Luke over stupid stuff- or as my dad would say, the "ant shit vs. elephant shit" things in life. I hear him talk about things his wife does or says and it helps me to look at myself and moderate my own behavior towards my husband.
In my 26 years, here is where I know and believe I draw the line on what's OK and what's not with boys and girls being just "friends" - if these things are done, I think that it's more than friends and the intentions of this friendship, with one party or the other, may be different than just having an innocent friendship:
- You do, say or act more comfortably with this "friend" than you would your partner or spouse. If you are telling this friend secrets about you or anyone else that you feel you couldn't tell your partner or spouse, this is a serious problem. You should trust your partner or spouse more than anyone, that's why you chose to make them your partner or spouse. The same goes for any actions with this person. If you don't feel comfortable acting like yourself or doing things you feel comfortable doing around your partner or spouse - there's a problem and clearly an elephant in the room that needs to be addressed.
- You say, "I love you," to this person. I'm sure there is some debate about this, but I just don't think it's appropriate to be throwing around these 3 words. I'm sure you do "love" this person, but don't say it like that. "Love" should be reserved for your partner or spouse and be exclusive.
- You talk to and pay attention more to this person more than your partner or spouse when they are both around you. I don't care how cool or how un-jealous someone is toward the friendship, this just isn't cool. Again, I'm sure there is popular debate about this, but to me, seems like a no-brainer. If Luke were paying more attention to another female all night long at some event, I would be pissed and not afraid to admit it.
- You would rather hang out or go do stuff with this "friend" than your partner or spouse. This is a given. If you would rather go see that "must see" movie or shop or go out to eat or go grab a drink with this boy or girl-FRIEND rather than your partner or spouse, again, elephant in the room that needs to be talked about. One of the most important factors in any relationship is your ability to go play together! If your partner or spouse doesn't want to go play and you like to go play, you may need to consider addressing this issue.
- You constantly talk about this person to your partner or spouse. This is just annoying. Don't do it and if you have a lot to say about the person, wonderful, tell it to your mom or a girlfriend or guyfriend that won't care or have hurt feelings about your overflow of information about this person.
In my opinion, boys and girls can play nice together and we can be friends, but I think we do need to be careful. People talk, people assume and people are sensitive. Even someone like Luke that appears all tough, I'm still always conscious of his feelings and am careful. I think that's important.
Anyway, enough about boys and girls for now... Life continues to show me things and I so enjoy blogging about them!!
Thursday, December 15, 2011
What's In It For Me?
So, still being a "newbie" in blogger world, I am still introducing myself and who I am and all that good stuff. Everytime I blog I feel like I'm revealing something new about myself to the world and it's really fun; so here we go... Another "getting to know Just Another Mrs." a little better.
In case you're stumbling across this page for the first time and didn't bother looking at my sidebar or reading through my archives, I am a mother of two young boys, Colt (2) and Jake (8 months). On top of this full-time job of being a Mama, I also work at SecuraDI Consultants as Director of Business Development. Now, contrary to most, I really love my job and let me tell you why:
I love my boys so much. More than I ever thought I would. I know that sounds weird, but before your a mom, deep down you're not ever sure if you even want to be a mom and then when you are, you can't imagine life before you weren't a mom. I would do anything for my kids. And when I leave them in the morning, my heart breaks everyday. I wonder if they dislike me for leaving them. I wonder if they'll always remember me leaving them when they get older. As I continue to advance at my job, which I love and makes me happy, I wonder if they'll only remember that mommy came home late a lot.
These fears honestly cripple me when I think about them. Sometimes I think I should quit my job and stay home and raise them. Sometimes I even get dirty looks from other moms that stay home because ladies, let's be honest, when it comes to working moms and stay at home moms, it's very "us" and "them", it's never "we" - but, I guess nothing ever is in the land of females. Can we ever just all get along for heaven's sake? (That's another blog entirely...).
When I think about being a stay at home mom, I really don't know if I could do it. Working is a part of who I am and it's what I love to do. I want to succeed and I want to be successful in this world. I want to help people and I want to make a difference and in my company I have a chance to do all of those things.
When the boys get older and go off to school and eventually leave home, not to be selfish here but, what the hell would I do with myself then? If I stay home with my kids and quit my job, honestly, when it's all said and done, what's in it for me?
This is selfish to say, I know - there would be PLENTY in it for me - I wouldn't miss a single moment of their lives and that alone would be completely priceless. But, I would be giving away a piece of myself and sacrificing a piece of myself that I don't know I could mentally or physically. To not be working and give up my dream of having a career of my own is something that I am in no place to do.
But, in this life, can you really have it all? Can I be the best mom I can be and the best employee I can be? Probably not, being a mom will always come first. If I have a sick child, I have to care for them. If my child is begging me to stay home and I have enough PTO, I might stay home and work remotely when I have the chance throughout the day.
Once again, life continues to show me things that I never thought I'd have to deal with emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually, but I guess that's what they call being an adult, right?
Please, stay-at-home mom's, avoid being to critical of me chasing my American Dream...
In case you're stumbling across this page for the first time and didn't bother looking at my sidebar or reading through my archives, I am a mother of two young boys, Colt (2) and Jake (8 months). On top of this full-time job of being a Mama, I also work at SecuraDI Consultants as Director of Business Development. Now, contrary to most, I really love my job and let me tell you why:
- I am not micro-managed. I don't have someone breathing down my neck or telling me what to do. As long as I'm getting my work done, typically there are no complaints from "the boss man".
- The owners of my company have a second home in South Carolina which creates for an even more "lax" work environment since they travel back and forth for weeks, even months at a time.
- I'm
one ofthe only female in my office that doesn't have "assistant" behind her title. (Yes, I am tooting my own horn here, sorry!!!!). - I don't have any issues with having to leave work at the drop of a hat and believe me, this is awesome considering I have two small children whose immune systems are still getting built up.
- I get to get out of the office and socialize, attend important meetings and give input to the direction our company is going.
I love my boys so much. More than I ever thought I would. I know that sounds weird, but before your a mom, deep down you're not ever sure if you even want to be a mom and then when you are, you can't imagine life before you weren't a mom. I would do anything for my kids. And when I leave them in the morning, my heart breaks everyday. I wonder if they dislike me for leaving them. I wonder if they'll always remember me leaving them when they get older. As I continue to advance at my job, which I love and makes me happy, I wonder if they'll only remember that mommy came home late a lot.
These fears honestly cripple me when I think about them. Sometimes I think I should quit my job and stay home and raise them. Sometimes I even get dirty looks from other moms that stay home because ladies, let's be honest, when it comes to working moms and stay at home moms, it's very "us" and "them", it's never "we" - but, I guess nothing ever is in the land of females. Can we ever just all get along for heaven's sake? (That's another blog entirely...).
When I think about being a stay at home mom, I really don't know if I could do it. Working is a part of who I am and it's what I love to do. I want to succeed and I want to be successful in this world. I want to help people and I want to make a difference and in my company I have a chance to do all of those things.
When the boys get older and go off to school and eventually leave home, not to be selfish here but, what the hell would I do with myself then? If I stay home with my kids and quit my job, honestly, when it's all said and done, what's in it for me?
This is selfish to say, I know - there would be PLENTY in it for me - I wouldn't miss a single moment of their lives and that alone would be completely priceless. But, I would be giving away a piece of myself and sacrificing a piece of myself that I don't know I could mentally or physically. To not be working and give up my dream of having a career of my own is something that I am in no place to do.
But, in this life, can you really have it all? Can I be the best mom I can be and the best employee I can be? Probably not, being a mom will always come first. If I have a sick child, I have to care for them. If my child is begging me to stay home and I have enough PTO, I might stay home and work remotely when I have the chance throughout the day.
Once again, life continues to show me things that I never thought I'd have to deal with emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually, but I guess that's what they call being an adult, right?
Please, stay-at-home mom's, avoid being to critical of me chasing my American Dream...
Monday, December 12, 2011
Absolutes for 2012
2011 was a year of a lot of growth in my life, physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. It was also a year full of bittersweet events. We experienced a lot of loss, but we had an amazing gain and blessing with the birth of our son, Jacob.
One thing that I am not too proud of this year was the way I chose to handle stressful situations. Whether it was at home, work or personal stress, I usually chose to handle it by having a drink or hitting the pavement. And trust me, I've made every excuse in the book to justify choosing these outlets. But, as the popular saying goes about excuses, they are like butts, everyone's got 'em and they all stink.
Drinking alcohol has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I grew up around it, I grew up drinking it and I've been in my share of trouble because of it - nothing drastic - I know what you're thinking. Although I in no way consider myself an alcoholic, I think I have a genetic disposition to enjoy adult beverages more than most. I also think I have a genetic disposition to think oddly towards those that don't drink. Yes, I think you're weird. Sorry.
One thing about alcohol that I don't like though is, like I said earlier, although it's good and although it's fun, it's not going to solve any problems, make anybody wiser or anybody richer or whatever you may be looking for. In fact, you're more likely to end up crying into your cocktail at the end of the night as you use it as an outlet - not like I know.... Regardless, 2012 I've decided is the year I truly only use alcohol to further enhance an already enjoyable situation (i.e. special occasions, celebrations or holidays). Period.
Running has also been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. Ever since I got called fat on the bus ride home from school in 9th grade. I learned that calories were important and exercise will keep your ass in shape and I surprisingly fell in love with running. In fact, running is sort of like a drug for me. My husband will literally tell me to go run on days he can tell I haven't gotten out in a few or if something seems to be really upsetting me, "OK, Go Run Sweetie..." - Just one of the million reasons why I love him, he lets me do what he knows I love and what helps me find Zen calm. Since we had Jacob, running has really taken a back seat in my life. It's tough to find time to hit the road when you have two babies at home! And waking up at 5AM to go for a run just doesn't happen everyday because I get too run down. Running, working full time, raising two kids, cooking, cleaning, there just aren't enough hours in the day nor are there enough "healthy" defenders running through my body to allow me to do that.
So, I know you're saying to yourself, big deal? She likes to run. But, sometimes I let my need to run take over my life. I put it before everything. My kids. My husband. JUST. NEED. TO. RUN. Now, it's not like I'm not taking care of my kids because I need to run, that's not what I'm saying, I'm just saying my mind goes there and I have trouble coming back from it unless I just go do it. 2012 will be the year I gain control of this addiction. Not sure how I'm going to do it yet, but none-the-less, either I'm going to make time or get on a schedule that allows me to do it, maintain my priorities and keep my sanity...
Even though sometimes I need a break from both my husband and my kids, don't think badly of me, I'm just being honest and if you say you don't need a break you're full of fooey, I want to try to be the very best wife and the very best mother I can possibly be to them. They are my everything and each everyday I want to show that. 2012 will be the year I step this up a notch and keep it there.
I want to eat healthier. There's a reason why all the experts tell us to eat more fruits and vegetables and some days I lay in bed and go, I didn't eat a single fruit or vegetable all day today!!! Unacceptable. I need to be a better example so in 2012, this makes the list too.
I'm standing up for my beliefs more. If someting isn't in line with what I believe or what kind of a person I want to be, I'm going to say or do something about it. I'm sure lots more blogging to come on this one...
And last, but certainly not least in 2012, I want to be a better friend. The past month or so I have made an effort to get together with a friend at least once a week and I tell you what, I am so much happier! I was making all kinds of excuses to not see my friends before - too busy, too long since we've seen each other, they don't understand my life now, blah, blah, blah. Clearly 2011 was also a year of bad excuses. There's a reason why you have a connection with people and I'm going to do a better job of maintaining mine...
Obviously I know I'm not a perfect person and I know that I may not stick to all these absolutes perfectly, but hey, I'm trying and I'm going to really make an effort to practice everything I'm preaching about here today.
Happy (almost) 2012 - I wish nothing but the best to whomever is reading my rantings :) :)
One thing that I am not too proud of this year was the way I chose to handle stressful situations. Whether it was at home, work or personal stress, I usually chose to handle it by having a drink or hitting the pavement. And trust me, I've made every excuse in the book to justify choosing these outlets. But, as the popular saying goes about excuses, they are like butts, everyone's got 'em and they all stink.
Drinking alcohol has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I grew up around it, I grew up drinking it and I've been in my share of trouble because of it - nothing drastic - I know what you're thinking. Although I in no way consider myself an alcoholic, I think I have a genetic disposition to enjoy adult beverages more than most. I also think I have a genetic disposition to think oddly towards those that don't drink. Yes, I think you're weird. Sorry.
One thing about alcohol that I don't like though is, like I said earlier, although it's good and although it's fun, it's not going to solve any problems, make anybody wiser or anybody richer or whatever you may be looking for. In fact, you're more likely to end up crying into your cocktail at the end of the night as you use it as an outlet - not like I know.... Regardless, 2012 I've decided is the year I truly only use alcohol to further enhance an already enjoyable situation (i.e. special occasions, celebrations or holidays). Period.
Running has also been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. Ever since I got called fat on the bus ride home from school in 9th grade. I learned that calories were important and exercise will keep your ass in shape and I surprisingly fell in love with running. In fact, running is sort of like a drug for me. My husband will literally tell me to go run on days he can tell I haven't gotten out in a few or if something seems to be really upsetting me, "OK, Go Run Sweetie..." - Just one of the million reasons why I love him, he lets me do what he knows I love and what helps me find Zen calm. Since we had Jacob, running has really taken a back seat in my life. It's tough to find time to hit the road when you have two babies at home! And waking up at 5AM to go for a run just doesn't happen everyday because I get too run down. Running, working full time, raising two kids, cooking, cleaning, there just aren't enough hours in the day nor are there enough "healthy" defenders running through my body to allow me to do that.
So, I know you're saying to yourself, big deal? She likes to run. But, sometimes I let my need to run take over my life. I put it before everything. My kids. My husband. JUST. NEED. TO. RUN. Now, it's not like I'm not taking care of my kids because I need to run, that's not what I'm saying, I'm just saying my mind goes there and I have trouble coming back from it unless I just go do it. 2012 will be the year I gain control of this addiction. Not sure how I'm going to do it yet, but none-the-less, either I'm going to make time or get on a schedule that allows me to do it, maintain my priorities and keep my sanity...
Even though sometimes I need a break from both my husband and my kids, don't think badly of me, I'm just being honest and if you say you don't need a break you're full of fooey, I want to try to be the very best wife and the very best mother I can possibly be to them. They are my everything and each everyday I want to show that. 2012 will be the year I step this up a notch and keep it there.
I want to eat healthier. There's a reason why all the experts tell us to eat more fruits and vegetables and some days I lay in bed and go, I didn't eat a single fruit or vegetable all day today!!! Unacceptable. I need to be a better example so in 2012, this makes the list too.
I'm standing up for my beliefs more. If someting isn't in line with what I believe or what kind of a person I want to be, I'm going to say or do something about it. I'm sure lots more blogging to come on this one...
And last, but certainly not least in 2012, I want to be a better friend. The past month or so I have made an effort to get together with a friend at least once a week and I tell you what, I am so much happier! I was making all kinds of excuses to not see my friends before - too busy, too long since we've seen each other, they don't understand my life now, blah, blah, blah. Clearly 2011 was also a year of bad excuses. There's a reason why you have a connection with people and I'm going to do a better job of maintaining mine...
Obviously I know I'm not a perfect person and I know that I may not stick to all these absolutes perfectly, but hey, I'm trying and I'm going to really make an effort to practice everything I'm preaching about here today.
Happy (almost) 2012 - I wish nothing but the best to whomever is reading my rantings :) :)
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Colder Weather
She ran through the cold.
Hair blowing in the wind.
So young, wild and free.
She came through the door, they locked eyes and grinned.
Love at first sight.
Who knew they'd say forever?
Separate lives came together.
Never fearing the colder weather.
Spring turned to summer.
Lives were changed, choices made.
The fall came too quick.
They said goodbye, but it didn't fade.
Love at first sight.
Who knew they'd say forever?
Separate lives came together.
Never fearing the colder weather.
Sleepless nights and empty hearts.
A call. A message. A sign.
Winter came back to greet them again-
Back together, it was only a matter of time.
Love at first sight.
Who knew they'd say forever?
Separate lives came together.
Never fearing the colder weather.
Time passed.
Laughs. Cries. Obstacles in their way.
Can we make it?
I don't know, she started to stray.
He wanted her back.
Her answer was no.
He didn't ever give up.
He wouldn't let her go.
Love at first sight.
Who knew they'd say forever?
Separate lives came together.
Never fearing the colder weather.
The walls came down.
Emotions set free.
He got on his knee.
He gave her a ring.
Love at first sight.
Who knew they'd say forever?
Separate lives came together.
Never fearing the colder weather.
They said their vows with family and friends.
They love to reminise of the days that have passed.
Memories so bright, moments forever cherished.
Now with two little boys, who knew they'd be parents?
We fell in love at first sight.
Who knew we'd say forever?
Completely separate lives, now come together.
Fearlessly, relentlessly, come warm or colder weather.
Some people hate the winter.
Despise the colder weather.
We love this time of year.
We met, we loved and said "I Do" in December... <3
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
A Look Back...
A co-worker was kind enough to share this site with me. Male, female - I don't care, get your kleenex because these pictures will move you to tears.
Ladies and Gentleman, 2011 was a hard year for our state, our country and our world. We have to come together and love, support and cherish one another....
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/the-most-powerful-photos-of-2011
Enjoy.
Ladies and Gentleman, 2011 was a hard year for our state, our country and our world. We have to come together and love, support and cherish one another....
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/the-most-powerful-photos-of-2011
Enjoy.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Gen Y - My Generation
As of late, I've been reading a lot of disheartening news about my generation (Gen Y). Most notably the following statistics really saddened me:
Now, there are some people that look for someone to blame for the bleak situation of my generation. So, let's try pointing some fingers...
Maybe we can blame our parents for sheltering us too much from the cruel, hard ways of the world because let's be honest, life was a helluva lot easier when we were 5 versus being 25.
Maybe we can blame our high schools for preaching to us to GO TO COLLEGE! A GOOD COLLEGE! And get an education. NOBODY mentioned that when we're finished we'll have 6 months, then it's HELLO, you're $50,000+++ in debt because you HAD TO GO TO COLLEGE TO GET A GOOD JOB. Which, by the way, is a buncha fooey. Do you really need a college education to get an entry level admin job? Get real.
Maybe we can blame the job market for requiring a college education to get even the most basic of jobs these days.
Regardless of blaming anyone, there is something seriously messed up with the way our society is raising it's youth right now. Luke and I have SO MUCH DEBT from student loans it's ridiculous. AND Although I was lucky to get a job after I was done with college, Luke couldn't! He finally had to settle for a teaching assistant job just to do something and get some job to start some kind of experience besides "construction".
What's worse, the better paying jobs won't hire you unless you have 5,7,10+ years of experience. But hey, how the hell can I get this "experience" if I can't get a job??? And so, we have a generation either...
a. Unemployed.
b. Working as a server or bartender.
c. Going back to school - collecting more debt.
d. Working in a job position where they're underpaid, under appreciated and OVER educated.
This is a sad, sad state to be in. Trust me, I am normally a happy-go-lucky optimist and I'm starting to really lose hope. My husband and I are overflowing with debt, have two children, health care costs are through the roof and we're on an HDHP to keep premium costs low, we're making "too much money" to be eligible for any kind of help from the state or anybody that has a program, so basically we're the "working poor" or America's new version of "the middle class".
Here's a few things I can tell you about my generation.
1. We are SO SMART.
2. We are well informed.
3. We know how to use Google better than anybody. Be warned.
4. We take multi-tasking to a WHOLE different level.
5. We are well educated - book smart or street smart or both, we know things.
6. We're resourceful. I've managed to put an amazing dinner together with chicken noodle soup, flour and bisquick.
7. We're independent.
8. We're healthy. Most of the youngin's in my office read labels, go organic or pick the green over the starch.
9. We may be young, but we weren't born yesterday.
10. We don't like being told what to do.
For those of you that are my age or a Gen Y'er and are having a tough time with life, your circumstance, whatever, hang in there... Unfortunately, it may get worse before it gets better, but like everything else in this life we will pull through it TOGETHER and we will bring this country back to a sensible place.
For those of you that aren't my age or a Gen Y'er - Infamous words from The Who:
- Only 56% of those who work say they're covered by some form of health plan.
- Just 58% pay their monthly bills on time.
- Nearly 70% of Gen Y is not building up a cash cushion, and 56% of those who work admit they have not done anything to build retirement or financial security.
- Credit card debt is high, with 43% carrying too much debt on their cards. The average Gen Y holds three credit cards, with 20% of them carrying a balance of more than $10,000.
- They are the least likely of any generation to own their own homes.
Now, there are some people that look for someone to blame for the bleak situation of my generation. So, let's try pointing some fingers...
Maybe we can blame our parents for sheltering us too much from the cruel, hard ways of the world because let's be honest, life was a helluva lot easier when we were 5 versus being 25.
Maybe we can blame our high schools for preaching to us to GO TO COLLEGE! A GOOD COLLEGE! And get an education. NOBODY mentioned that when we're finished we'll have 6 months, then it's HELLO, you're $50,000+++ in debt because you HAD TO GO TO COLLEGE TO GET A GOOD JOB. Which, by the way, is a buncha fooey. Do you really need a college education to get an entry level admin job? Get real.
Maybe we can blame the job market for requiring a college education to get even the most basic of jobs these days.
Regardless of blaming anyone, there is something seriously messed up with the way our society is raising it's youth right now. Luke and I have SO MUCH DEBT from student loans it's ridiculous. AND Although I was lucky to get a job after I was done with college, Luke couldn't! He finally had to settle for a teaching assistant job just to do something and get some job to start some kind of experience besides "construction".
What's worse, the better paying jobs won't hire you unless you have 5,7,10+ years of experience. But hey, how the hell can I get this "experience" if I can't get a job??? And so, we have a generation either...
a. Unemployed.
b. Working as a server or bartender.
c. Going back to school - collecting more debt.
d. Working in a job position where they're underpaid, under appreciated and OVER educated.
This is a sad, sad state to be in. Trust me, I am normally a happy-go-lucky optimist and I'm starting to really lose hope. My husband and I are overflowing with debt, have two children, health care costs are through the roof and we're on an HDHP to keep premium costs low, we're making "too much money" to be eligible for any kind of help from the state or anybody that has a program, so basically we're the "working poor" or America's new version of "the middle class".
Here's a few things I can tell you about my generation.
1. We are SO SMART.
2. We are well informed.
3. We know how to use Google better than anybody. Be warned.
4. We take multi-tasking to a WHOLE different level.
5. We are well educated - book smart or street smart or both, we know things.
6. We're resourceful. I've managed to put an amazing dinner together with chicken noodle soup, flour and bisquick.
7. We're independent.
8. We're healthy. Most of the youngin's in my office read labels, go organic or pick the green over the starch.
9. We may be young, but we weren't born yesterday.
10. We don't like being told what to do.
For those of you that are my age or a Gen Y'er and are having a tough time with life, your circumstance, whatever, hang in there... Unfortunately, it may get worse before it gets better, but like everything else in this life we will pull through it TOGETHER and we will bring this country back to a sensible place.
For those of you that aren't my age or a Gen Y'er - Infamous words from The Who:
Why don't you all f-fade away
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Don't try to dig what we all s-s-say
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm not trying to cause a big s-s-sensation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm just talkin' 'bout my g-g-generation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
My generation
This is my generation, baby
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
Don't try to dig what we all s-s-say
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm not trying to cause a big s-s-sensation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
I'm just talkin' 'bout my g-g-generation
(Talkin' 'bout my generation)
My generation
This is my generation, baby
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